Mental health can sometimes be a particularly difficult topic for men to talk about and reach out for support for. We asked our male staff members their top tips for looking after their own mental health, as well as how they support their mates when the chips are down.

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Martyn Weir

CEO & Managing Director, Oqea

Do you have any self-care practices? If yes, please describe.

Try and keep up on the exercise which at the moment is road cycling. It is always hard in winter but you feel so much better after it. I also try and manage my sleep and always need to remind myself on the diet.

 How do you de-stress after a long week?

Relaxing with the family, listening to music, doing some exercise, watching my kids play sports, catching up with friends.

‍How do you help a mate who seems a bit down/ is struggling?

Call him, catch up with him in person and touch base more often. Also let other mates know.

 Who do you talk to when times are tough and why?

When I was younger my family, as we talk more about our wellbeing with my mates, now them and my wife.

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Richard Magtengaard

Consultant Psychiatrist, Resolute

Do you have any self-care practices? If yes, please describe.

Gardening and walking

Good routine based around getting enough sleep

No alcohol

Healthy diet

Reading non-fiction and history channel

 How do you de-stress after a long week?

Time with my wife and the boys

 How do you help a mate who seems a bit down/ is struggling?

Send him a text each morning with a ‘?’

He sends back either a thumbs up or down

If it’s a thumbs down I make a call and we talk it through 

 Who do you talk to when times are tough and why?

Wife, respected senior colleagues, if needed a psychologist

Anton Pearce

Chief Product Officer, Oqea

Do you have any self-care practices? If yes, please describe.

Keep sometime free of devices and work communications. Play guitar, read a book(preferably an actual printed book, not an ebook) and spend as much time with my family as possible.

How do you de-stress after a long week?

Bushwalking in the winter, beach in the summer, biking and kicking a footy with the kids.

How do you help a mate who seems a bit down/ is struggling?

Just be available to have a chat.

Who do you talk to when times are tough and why?

My wife, my best mate and my mum are all good to talk to and each offer unique perspective and value.

Drummond Orr

Business Analyst, Oqea

Do you have any self-care practices? If yes, please describe.

Exercise (running, going to the gym). Relaxation (playing a game of FIFA, watching a film). Listening to an album. 

 How do you de-stress after a long week?

All the above. Additionally, hanging out with mates. 

 How do you help a mate who seems a bit down/ is struggling?

Obviously, you need to ask "are you ok" or "how are you" and listen carefully. Often, your mate just needs to unload their issues so it is important to focus and see what you can do. This is fairly common advice. I would go one step further and keep this conversation in mind throughout your friendship. Mental health issues persist and can return with vengeance. Even if your mate appears to improve, they may experience similar issues a year later. They may be more reluctant to seek help because they think they should have dealt with it when they had the previous issue. This is a war that does not end so expect to be in it for the long haul. 

‍Who do you talk to when times are tough and why?

 Friends and family are important, however be careful of their biased perceptions of you. Equally, sometimes friends and family have hidden agendas that may not be in your interest. That is why seek their help and the opinion of a psychologist/counsellor who can provide an objective opinion. The more you can match what's going on inside your head with reality, the better you will feel. 

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Lucas Carvalho

Web Developer, Oqea

Do you have any self-care practices? If yes, please describe.

‍Soccer sometimes with a friend, gym, cycling (started recently), going out for dinner, travelling, reading about technology subjects and the news, computer games and movies.

 How do you de-stress after a long week?

More sleeping hours and exercise.

 How do you help a mate who seems a bit down/ is struggling?

A good talk and occasionally text the person for small talks.

Who do you talk to when times are tough and why?

People that I'm close to (my girlfriend and family)

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